Category: Inspiration

A Leela of Her Own

Guards! Bring me the forms I need to fill out to have her taken away! Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn’t I break his legs? Tell them I hate them. Yes, except the Dave Matthews Band doesn’t rock. The Honking Hey, guess what you’re accessories to. I […]

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Homer: Bad Man

Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. …And the fluffy kitten played with that ball of string all through the night. On a lighter note, a Kwik-E-Mart clerk was brutally murdered last night. That’s why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them. Natural […]

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Crimes of the Hot

OK, this has gotta stop. I’m going to remind Fry of his humanity the way only a woman can. Hey! I’m a porno-dealing monster, what do I care what you think? Ah, computer dating. It’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase “upside your head.” I love this planet! I’ve got wealth, […]

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Whoa, slow down there, maestro. There’s a *New* Mexico?

I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals…except the weasel. I’m a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world. When will I learn? The answers to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of […]

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The Idiot’s Lantern

You hate me; you want to kill me! Well, go on! Kill me! KILL ME! Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff. You hit me with a cricket bat. Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! The Unicorn and the Wasp I’m the Doctor, I’m worse than everyone’s aunt. *catches himself* And that […]

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